Hi, I am Nicole, one of the oldest Millennial Mom's, some would call me Xennial, since I was born in 1982.
I am a blogger and author of "Trauma Survivor's Guide to Coping With Panic Attacks" and "Happy. Healthy. Rich. The smart mom's guide to living your best life."
I am a proud mom to my two girls, Atlantis (19) and River(5), as well as my plus one child, Atlantis's Partner Phyre (18). I share my life with my wonderful partner, Gary.
Even though I am grateful for a beautiful life, I have been through the rain and the down times too. I have PTSD, Anxiety and Depression. They are managed for now, but all of them are lifelong conditions that I have to keep under control.
Since I am interested in Mental Health Issues, I obtained a BA in Psychology from University of Colorado in 2008.
About My Writing
I believe that our own health and happiness is intertwined with our parenting. Taking care of ourselves so that we can be at our best helps us to be happier moms, and better parents overall. It is hard to provide for our kids in the best way possible when we are feeling depleted.
Sometimes, I blog about self-care and mental health and wellness. This is a topic that is close to my heart, and I want to help raise awareness about mental health issues. I share quite a bit of my own mental health journey on the blog.
My parenting style is Attachment Parenting, and I focus on whole-child wellness, and communication with children in a responsive and non-violent way. I advocate for patience and empathy with our kiddos.
Besides that, I also provide some shopping hacks, personal finance information, and product reviews. In many research studies, finance is listed as one of most people's top worries. If we can help to alleviate some of the stress about money, that contributes to our family's overall wellness too!
I chose the tagline "Mom Life Gets Messy" for my blog because I think all too often as moms there is this societal expectation that we can do everything flawlessly, and that is seldom (if ever) the case. Real life is messy, it is flawed, my house is usually covered with glitter or popcorn crumbs no matter how much I vacuum, and I have to balance the expectations of being a full-time mom, and having a full time job. That is the case for so many of us!
In life, when we expect perfection, we are almost always disappointed. When we can embrace the mess, enjoy the journey, accept ourselves today while striving for a better tomorrow, we create a much happier and more whole life. Perfection doesn't need to be our end goal.
"Perfect is the enemy of good."
When we strive for perfection, we often miss just how good our lives our right now. We are too busy fixating on InstaMom's perfect hair and perfect children to embrace the wonder that is the life we have with our families right now. We can have good and fulfilling lives when we drop the expectation of perfect! Accepting and embracing the good that comes with the mess allows us to flourish and live our best lives. And yes, sometimes we are going to be living our best lives wearing a too-small tiara while dancing to Elsa singing "Let it Go" in the kitchen for the 30th time in one day.
Embrace the moment, dance the wild dance in your heart, and always be there to straighten another mom's too-small tiara.
Be well until next time my friends!
Nicole Dake